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Post by Juan Hefe on Mar 31, 2009 8:27:27 GMT -5
WHAT: VCW PUB CRAWL 2K9 (HOSTED BY SLEDGEHAMMER JUSTICE)
WHERE and WHEN: RIGHT AFTER LONGSHOT
10PM - 11PM PT's Pub (Rainbow Blvd)
11PM - 12AM Kerry's Sports Pub (Rancho Dr)
12AM - 1AM Tilted Kilt (Flamingo Rd)
1AM - 2AM Shadow Bar (Las Vegas Blvd)
2AM - 3AM Gordon Biersch Brewing Co (Paradise Rd)
3AM - 4AM Crown & Anchor Pub (just off UNLV Campus)
WHO: 1. "Filthy" Rich Burton 2. Barry Knight 3. "Teddy Bear" Tsavales 4. Teddy's Lady Love Big Bertha 5. Tyler Marx 6. "Fabulous" Dan Francisco 7. Water 8. Ryan Bowdridge 9. Juan Hefe 10. Sad Boy 11. Chaos 12. Napalm 13. Elisha Knight 14. ___________________________ 15. ___________________________
HOW: RENTED BUS IN FRONT OF THE ARENA AFTER THE SHOW
BE THERE OR BE SQUARE, WE DON'T REALLY CARE
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Post by Juan Hefe on Apr 1, 2009 20:27:43 GMT -5
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Legend: "Filthy" Rich Burton ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
On the tour bus, en route to PT's Pub on Rainbow Boulevard...
"Filthy" Rich Burton grabs the microphone at the front of the tour bus and taps it twice.
"One, two. One, two. Is this thing on?"
Nods of ascent in the sparsely crowded bus.
"Alright everyone, thanks for coming along tonight, it really means a lot to Bar and I, seeing as how this is our first night back in Vegas as Sledgehammer Justice!"
Some of the wrestlers in the bus clap their hands.
"Ok, so the first stop is PT's Pub, it's sort of a sports pub for locals and the beer is cheap. In other words, the perfect first stop for our little adventure. Any questions?"
A hand in the back of the bus goes up and unintelligible words filter up to the front.
"Stand up back there, I can't see or hear you!"
((OOC: Anybody who wants to take the rock to the rack can do so))
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Post by RyanBow412 on Apr 1, 2009 20:47:39 GMT -5
Water stands up. He's changed out of his typical blue shirt and jeans and got a silk blue short sleeve floral shirt and nice blue khakis.
"Are we responsible for any damage we do, or can Hefe cover it?"
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Post by Juan Hefe on Apr 2, 2009 4:46:34 GMT -5
Hefe gets up from his seat and grabs the microphone from Burton.
"Hey, this isn't my gig, this a SLEDGEHAMMER JUSTICE sponsored event! I'm just here for the ride, man."
Hefe hands the microphone back to Burton.
"Heheh, well Water, all damage YOU incur will come out of Ryan Bowdridge's pocket! Ain't that right Ryan?"
Burton walks over to Ryan Bowdridge who is sitting halfway down the bus and hands him the microphone.
"Uh..."
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Post by Devlin on Apr 2, 2009 5:30:10 GMT -5
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!"
Everyone turns around to the back of the bus, to where Tyler Marx is sitting. There is deadly silence on the tour bus, save for the faint hum of the PA system.
"What?" He asks. He twitches, buckles his seat belt, and sits quietly.
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Post by Juan Hefe on Apr 2, 2009 8:02:50 GMT -5
Sad Boy who is sitting beside Tyler Marx yells in pain and horror as his arm is casually dragged across Marx's waist and used as a seatbelt.
"Ow! I think you broke all of my fingers!"
Meanwhile, back at the front of the bus, Juan Hefe recoils in horror as a massively muscled (and perfumed) arm reaches across his chest from behind in a manly caress.
"What the hell?"
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Roy
Moderator
The Roy
Posts: 448
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Post by Roy on Apr 2, 2009 15:40:36 GMT -5
...and is shoved back down by a mammoth being in a mask known only as Chaos. He stares down at Hefe which causes Sledgehammer Justice and Ted to stand up in his defense. They appear confident until Napalm rises from behind Chaos as he ascends the steps of the bus.
Mass Destruction look on at Sledgehammer Justice, almost challenging them to come ahead.
The Women's Champion Elisha Knight pushes between the huge men
WOOOOOOOW! easy boys! we're not here to cause trouble, we're here to drink and have a good time. Take it easy.
Mass Destruction settle down a bit
If it's OK with the fine gentlemen of Sledgehammer Justice we would like to join you on this little trip.
SHJ are about to answer
...good!
Take a seat boys
Mass Destruction sit down next to each other like good little school boys and Elisha Knight sits on their knees but gives Big Bertha a quick glance before she does.
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Post by Juan Hefe on Apr 2, 2009 17:35:54 GMT -5
Burton gives both hulking brutes in Mass Destruction the stink eye and then turns back towards Ryan Bowdridge who still has his mic.
"Well Ryan, what'll it be?"
No response from the Champ. Barry Knight gets up from his seat and claps Burton on the shoulder.
"Leave 'im alone yer fat oaf, right, he's still dealin' wiv the fact that 'e'll 'ave ter contend wiv that bonafide maniac, Scrappy Joe for 'is 'ardcore belt AND that bonafide psychopaff Seamus Anderson for 'is 'eavyweight belt. S'truth!"
Burton takes back his microphone and heads to the front of the bus.
"Alrighty then! Let's get this show on the road! Onto PT's Place!"
Everyone on the bus let's out an exuberant yell (well, everyone except Sad Boy who is whimpering, Tyler Marx who is struggling with his sanity and both lads in Mass Destruction who are somewhat insane).
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Post by RyanBow412 on Apr 2, 2009 21:35:07 GMT -5
Ryan chuckles a bit before patting Barry on the back.
"Don't worry about that, man. I'm not scared of either of them. I'm the Triple Crown Champ, I'm not scared of anybody."
While bragging, Tyler Marx has sneaked up the Champion and screams right into his ear.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHA!"
Ryan jumps ten feet before diving under one of the seats of the bus. Water just laughs and shakes his head.
"You're one in a million man."
He gets up and walks over to Burton.
"Hey, Rich, you think we could get some tunes playing? It's about as dull as Hefe here."
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Post by Juan Hefe on Apr 3, 2009 6:12:00 GMT -5
Hefe gets up and goes to sit beside Water, pulling out a little brown bottle out of his coat pocket as he does so.
"So I'm boring am I Water? You know what this is?"
"Looks like hippo spit."
Hefe turns the vial this way and that in front of Water's face.
"Nice guess, but wrong. This, Water, is distilled alligator melatonin."
Water takes the bottle and unscrews it, sniffing the contents.
"It doesn't smell like anything, how do I know this isn't just a bottle of water, pun intended, natch, that you use to impress people?"
"Go ahead and put a drop on your tongue, we'll see if it's just water..."
"A drop? A specimen like me scoffs at a drop. Fire in the hole!"
To Hefe's horror, Water downs the entire bottle in one gulp.
"You fool! What have you done?!? Do you have any idea what you've done?"
"What are you talking about, I'm no lightwei...."
Water's eyes go round as he realizes that he's perhaps bitten off more than even he can chew.
"What... what... is in this stuff?"
Hefe ignores Water and rushes to the front of the bus.
"Rich! You gotta come back there with me, that fool Water's just downed a whole bottle of distilled alligator melatonin!"
"HE WHAT?!?!? We haven't even reached PT's Place yet and he's already neck deep in debauchery? What a guy!"
"Come on this is no laughing matter!"
The two rush to the back of the bus but are interrupted by an animal like wail that stops them in their tracks. Burton pulls Hefe in close and whispers in his ear.
"He's got the fear! Let me handle this, you go back to the front and get Teddy Bear, I think he has some gravol in his fanny pack."
Hefe runs back to the front of the bus while Burton eases his way to the back. Suddenly, Water pops up out of the seat like a bat out of hell.
"MY DOCTOR SAID MYLANTA!"
"Calm down Water, Hefe is coming back here with some gravol. You just took the equivalent of fifteen Red BullsTM. The key is to calm down."
Water looks down at Burton from the overhead baggage carrier, a look of pure panic in his eyes.
"BUSINESS REPLY MAIL?!?!?"
"I've got the gravol Rich!"
Burton takes the gravol and walks cautiously closer to Water.
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Post by Devlin on Apr 3, 2009 11:19:30 GMT -5
Amidst the drama, Tyler Marx appears beside Hefe as Burton is just about to attempt to administer the gravol (whatever the hell that is). Tyler Marx looks on in interest with a raised eyebrow.
"Say, anyone know where I can get me some of that?"
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Post by RyanBow412 on Apr 3, 2009 14:45:23 GMT -5
Just before Rich can get any closer, a blow dart flies into Water's neck.
"WHAT FORM OF TOMFOOLERY WAS THAT?!"
He grabs the dart, stares at it for a second, before slumping into the overhead baggage compartment, unconscious.
Everyone looks to see who shot it, and realize it was the bus driver, the same woman who was hassled by the VCW Superstars on their flight to Moscow. They didn't even realize that she had pulled the bus over.
"EVERYONE GET BACK IN THEIR SEATS! GAH!"
Everyone heads back to their seats like scolded children as she starts the bus up again.
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Post by Juan Hefe on Apr 3, 2009 17:30:39 GMT -5
((OOC: +1 Karma RB!))
With the bus passengers again firmly in her control, the harried bus driver turns on the radio to a local R&B station. The first song that comes on is a brand new song by Lil Wayne called Climb Aboard the Lil Wayne Train based off a remix of Climb Aboard the Pain Train by "The Pain Train" Bill Dallas.
Once again sitting on Big Bertha's lap, Ted Tsavales begins humming the tune.
"Hey now! This is the catchiest song I've ever heard!"
Sitting on the bench beside the happy couple, "Filthy" Rich Burton groans in dismay.
"You serious Teddy Bear? That song and the guy singing the original are the most annoying things I've ever encountered."
Juan Hefe turns around from the seat in front.
"I gotta agree with Ted on this one Rich, it's pretty damn catchy. How do you know this guy?"
Barry Knight, sitting in the seat opposite Hefe lets out a loud guffaw.
"I still remember the bloomin' feud 'e 'ad wiv Water, remember that Shotokan Karate tournament Rich? That were Old Kent Roads of fun! S'truth!"
"Shotokan Karate tournament? Feud with Water? Who the hell is this guy?"
"He's an ex-football player who also happens to be a black belt in shotokan karate who's currently a motivational speaker here in Vegas. He had a short, uneventful run here in VCW and then just left without too much fanfare."
"Hmmm, you still got this guy's number?"
Burton points to a billboard featuring "The Pain Train" himself on the side of the road.
"There he is, larger than life, with a phone number and everything."
The three men are interrupted by Ted's exuberant singing.
"ARE YOU READY VEGAS!!! WOO WOO!!! THE PAIN TRAIN IS HERE TO SHAKE YOU UP AND THROW YOU DOWN!!! ALL ABOOOOOOOOOOOOOARD!!! WOO WOO!!!"
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Post by RyanBow412 on Apr 3, 2009 17:44:34 GMT -5
Amid Ted's singing, the bus hits a sharp bump, causing everyone to bounce off their seats, and Water to bounce off the overhead baggage holder and onto the floor with a loud thud. The bus driver replies with a loud intelligible shout, and he slowly climbs onto an open seat and lies down.
"What the hell happened? I feel jittery and lethargic at the same time. I'm pretty sure its an inhuman feeling."
Ryan pops his head over the seat and looks at Water.
"Firstly, you drank a vial of alligator melatonin, so I'm gonna recommend you don't compete for a while, lest you fail a drug test. Then the bus driver shot you with a blow dart laced with god-knows-what, and that knocked you out for a bit."
"Was the bus driver a man or woman?"
"A woman, why?"
"Then she's my kinda woman."
He laughs, somewhat crazily. Tyler Marx replies with a similar chuckle. Water laughs a little louder, and Marx laughs a little louder than Water. Soon they are in a cackling match, seeing who can laugh louder and more crazily than the other. Ryan take this as his cue to move forward a bit to sit near Sledgehammer Justice and Hefe.
"So, Hefe, what've you been up to since you left CPW?"
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