Masked Observer: Welcome Back!

[Juan Hefe]

Hello again! It is I, your very favourite luchadorian online insider, returned from the dead and back for more action than you can shake a stick at!
In the days... nay weeks... nay months... nay years(!) that I've been gone, I've travelled far and wide but now, my appetite for adventure has been quenched! I am ready to return to the city I love, Las Vegas, to comment on my very favourite lucha promotion in the world, Vegas Championship Wrestling!
Interestingly enough, I return just as some old friends of ours make their return to the VCW Arena, Sledgehammer Justice and their management team, Juan Hefe and Ted Tsavales!
Now, those of you who are paranoid may draw conclusions from this complete coincidence and presuppose that I am one of: "Filthy" Rich Burton, Barry Knight, Ted Tsavales or Juan Hefe, but I assure you, nothing could be further from the truth!
And to prove my innocence, I bring to you an interview conducted by myself and all four previously mentioned industry giants! Without further adieu, on to the interview!

Legend
Juan Hefe
"Filthy" Rich Burton
Barry Knight
Ted Tsavales
Masked Observer

Masked Observer Gentlemen, glad to have you aboard for my very first interview back from the dead on VCW.com!

Juan Hefe Happy to be here Observer, it's been too long since we've last chatted!

Masked Observer Indeed it has Mr. Hefe, I take it you're still on your best behaviour?

Juan Hefe (laughs) Next question please...

Ted Tsavales Hey Observer, Ted here. You still have some of that awesome tasting...

"Filthy" Rich Burton Quit talking about food you overgrown buffoon! Observer ain't interested in your damn appetite! Hey Observer, what about that midget, donkey...

Masked Observer (nervous laughter) Uh, I plead the fifth on that one Rich!

"Filthy" Rich Burton Damn...

Barry Knight Oi Observer, Barry Knight 'ere, great ter be goin' on ter yer again guvnah! S'truth!

Masked Observer Hiya Barry! It's just like old times again I've got to say and, just like old times, I have a looooooooooooooooooong list of questions to ask you tonight! Are you game?

Juan Hefe Yup!

"Filthy" Rich Burton Hells Yes!

Barry Knight Oi!

Ted Tsavales Gosh, I'm sorta hungry, is this gonna take long?

"Filthy" Rich Burton Shut it Ted!

Barry Knight Take it easy on the lad yer fat oaf! Blimey!

Masked Observer (laughs) Let me interject here before this turns into a verbal brawl the likes of which the Interweebs have never seen!

Juan Hefe Sounds great, get the questions rolling Observer, we are ready and willing.

"Filthy" Rich Burton You sound like my date last night Hefe!

Masked Observer Alrighty then, on that note, here's question number one and it's a doozy! What brings you fellas back to VCW? Mr. Hefe, how about you go first and we'll go from there.

Juan Hefe Well Observer, it's quite simple. I've been away from the wrestling business for way too long and I was starting to miss it horribly. My last experience ended rather badly and I wasn't willing to let that be my legacy. I'm here in Vegas to help out in any way I can, whether that be managing up and coming talent or helping out behind the scenes in a match booking capacity.

Masked Observer Ah, so you're actually in Vegas to help out with booking?

Juan Hefe I never said that! In fact, I will go on record right here as saying that I'm going to be so cooperative this time around that people might perceive me as being boring.

"Filthy" Rich Burton You poor deluded bastard! People will always perceive you as boring because you are! You could be single-handedly taking over the world and most of us would just turn over and yawn.

Barry Knight S'truth!

"Filthy" Rich Burton You could be the leading money getter in the PGA tour and people would find a reason to star watching the LPGA!

Ted Tsavales He's got you there boss!

"Filthy" Rich Burton You're so boring...

Masked Observer Alrighty then! Let's cut this off now and get on with the questions! Ted, how come you've come to Las Vegas?

Ted Tsavales Mr. Hefe told me to.

"Filthy" Rich Burton What a frickin' tool...

Masked Observer Rich? Same question.

"Filthy" Rich Burton Well, I sort of got tired of being a bartender. Long story...

Barry Knight Rich sort of overstayed 'is welcome guvnah! S'truth!

Masked Observer And you Barry?

Barry Knight I'm four fifffs of this bloody team Observer, right, and besides, the bloomin' fat oaf would 'ave no chance fightin' in singgles! S'truth!

Masked Observer Interesting, so on to the next question. What happened the night after your first Longshot? I heard all sorts of wild stories involving destruction of property, illicit drugs and midgets gone wild! Frankly, I was wishing you'd invited me over to the party!

"Filthy" Rich Burton Well, Bar and I thought up the idea of a pub crawl to get to know the lads a bit before we really start going again in VCW.

Barry Knight Right, and then evryfink went 'aywire after the guvnah got this dog and bone call at about free in the bloody mornin'.

Masked Observer Oh? Care to comment Mr. Hefe?

Juan Hefe Well Observer, it's pretty simple. In my time away from wrestling, I've been bounty hunting along with Ted.

Masked Observer Bounty hunting?!? Isn't that dangerous?

Juan Hefe Only if you aren't prepared. And you can bet that Ted and I are as prepared as any bounty hunter you've ever met.

Masked Observer So how will this affect your return to wrestling?

Juan Hefe It won't, the two are completely separate ventures.

Masked Observer But didn't you get help from VCW personel that night?

Juan Hefe Next question!

Masked Observer That's all I got.

Juan Hefe Oh, well see ya Observer, nice chatting with you again!

Masked Observer Uh, yeah. Well I guess that's it guys, thanks for taking the time to speak with me today.

"Filthy" Rich Burton No probs Observer, make sure you check out the next Longshot, could be highly entertaining!

Barry Knight Keep yor mince pies peeled Observer, we're about ter go 'ollywood! Blimey!

Masked Observer I will!